morning glory Kula

I really think that being a parent is one of the greatest challenges in life with the least amount of training. Thus, many parents live in a world of stress. When we are overly stressed, we can loose control in reaction and say or do something to a child that we later regret. If you have already taken yourself to court, found yourself guilty and are doing “time” PLEASE forgive yourself…because if you are busy beating yourself up, you are not there for you…or your child. Instead… manifest some time to look and see HOW DID THIS HAPPEN?

Anytime we run off the road, it is not a national tragedy… instead… it is an opportunity to learn something new… to correct how we are steering our life. So, is it time for TIME IN? What I mean by this is that you make it a priority to create some quiet time for yourself…just being in nature… or alone in a comfortable room to do some introspection regarding the question: Are you taking care of yourself on a preventative level? This means that you schedule in time for you to rest, and renew yourself.

Children want parents to be happy and loving. If you are forgetting yourself and focusing on your child’s needs… it just doesn’t work. You taking care of yourself is the best gift you can give your child. AND THEN focus on your child. Otherwise, your child can become agitated in your negative energy or works hard to push your buttons in the attempt to assist you in LETTING GO! Kids like to feel good vibes and when you are locked up in anger, sadness, stress, fear or guilt… your child is affected.

There are some really effective ways of letting go: Go swimming in the ocean, go under water and scream your head off as you let your body flail. No one can hear you. Put a pillow over your face and scream – sound therapy -let it out! Do some deep breathing into your belly, have a good cathartic cry, yoga, walking, running, playing… just letting go and coming back to your heart and remembering how special you are…and that the more you love yourself, the more you can truly love your child.

When you shine, your child bathes in your loving light and together it becomes easier to create a more peaceful home.

Image Credit: Infinity Photography Hawaii

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Jane A. Eldridge is a licensed Marriage & Family Therapist who integrates psychological understanding with a foundation of spiritual awareness. She is an experienced relationship specialist and offers deep healing through body-centered therapy. For more information you can call 808-268-7750 or email She no longer lives on Maui but moved to Sebastopol in California.