I know it is spiritually appropriate to be in the NOW, and that you are a busy Mom or Dad, however, when you have a quiet time for reflection, look into the future. What are your goals for your child? Remember, in the teen years s/he MUST pull away; be separate from you in order to become his/her own person.
I’m sure that one of your goals would be to have a happy human being – one who can handle the challenges of the ups and downs of life, who has inner strength and, what we call a positive attitude. So how about starting that very early? In fact, with a healthy, normal baby, it is inborn. Children who are feeling good about their world have a “can do” attitude. My core focus here is that you are a model and a coach. Your child will absorb and imitate you and the close folks present in her life. (I will address that in my next article, The Power of YOU, the First Role Model).
For today, let’s start with one practice. The practice of saying, “Yes.”
Once upon a time I read that the average two year old hears 17 “No’s” to ONE “Yes.” What powerful imprinting of a negative attitude! I know that modern parents do lots of things that bring that ratio down. I am asking for one bottom line direct and powerful idea:
Practice saying, “Yes” every possible time your child approaches you. Examples: you are doing dishes at the sink and your 5 year old says she wants you to read a book. You answer, “Yes, what a great idea. While I finish the dishes, I’ll start a story.” Your toddler wants an untouchable item. You say, “Yes, I see that is something you like very much. It’s so pretty. Let’s look with our eyes… glad you like it. Here’s something for you, you may touch.” Practice a yes even if you don’t say it. The thought of “Yes” will set your brain in motion and creative ideas will come. If the child makes a request that cannot be honored at the moment, pause; tell them what and when they can do it, rather than just saying, “No”.
The law of attraction also supports the use of “Yes”, rather than “No”. It is so much more positive, especially when it comes to connecting with our children. Yes is filled with new possibilities, freedom and movement and is a great attitude to have mirrored back. Try it and practice your, “Yes” you may be surprised by the results.