We live in a fast paced world, even on Maui. I know many moms, both stay at home moms, and working moms that find it equally challenging to make time to nurture themselves. Sourcing the parent within means that we not only take care of our family, but that we must take care of ourselves. We must remember that to take care and to nourish ourselves is taking care of and nourishing our family.
When my son was a baby through early toddler years I found it easy to adjust to him, to be totally present, and move slow with him. As he grows older, and more and more independent, I am gaining more independence again. I find that my fast paced tempo, and driven nature has come back full force. I know that when I get out of balance, so does my boy. I have to watch myself to make time special with him by not constantly checking emails on my iphone to catch up with something, or folding that last load of laundry, or whatever distraction it may be. I am aware that his need for intimacy, and presence, is equal to mine. I am aware that his sense of security relates to a large degree on how I am doing.
I remember the first time I felt that I needed to be aware of my presence with my boy. It was after I had gone back to work part- time after a maternity leave, and I was multitasking FOR SURE. Basically a phone addict since birth, I decided it was time to leave the phone behind for a few hours and just be together at the beach this day. As I was watching my boy chase after bubbles, I was reminded that my happiest and most peaceful moments are always like this one, coming from the simplicity of being exactly where I am. Slowing down and nurturing my connection with my son is certainly a priority, and that day on the beach I realized that in doing this I was nurturing myself too.
I was also recently reminded of how important it is to take care of myself, and the impact that this has on my parenting. A few months ago I was rear-ended in my car two days before moving house. I pushed on and on, until I realized that I needed to take proper rest to maximize my recovery. My chiropractor would ask me every time I saw her if I was taking time to rest in small increments. My answer was always no. Without this rest, I was less available for my son when I was with him, and I am sure I was also less patient. Now back on track with rest, exercise, and not making house cleaning important, I am available to be the mother my son needs.
Whatever it is you need to do to nourish yourself, go for it today. Do one thing a day that is self-nourishing. Last week I forced myself to take time alone to walk on the beach instead of some project on my to do list taking over, and I was amazed at how much this nourished me. I remind myself that taking this time without my child actually helps him as I came back to him as a mother centered and at peace ready to give him my full attention.
Photograph courtesy: Infusion Yoga Maui
Image Credit: Cadencia Photography