My breasts have the compulsion to confess and share the journey from vanity to a divine life source. When I was a teenager I watched models and actresses that adorned their perfect bodies. In my late teens I had a corporate job that helped motivate me to achieve the perfect body. In my early twenties I came to a point where the job meant having the look and my ego and I decided to get breast implants. There I was at a plastic surgeon asking about the procedure. The first question out of my mouth was, “I want to breastfeed.” He reassured me that implants done under the breast muscle are the best way for overall look and no complications with breastfeeding. I was a breastfed baby and grew up with the belief that babies were meant to breastfeed. I chose to have saline breast implants and went from a 34B to a 34DD.
I moved to Maui and met my now husband and discovered I was pregnant. I was advised to start reading up on breastfeeding and the mechanics of my breasts as they were going to be making milk and providing a life source. I would be breastfeeding with implants. My once perfect surgically enlarged breasts were going to go on quite an adventure. Before my son was born my midwife said that I would have “porn star” breasts after the baby was born. After my son was born I was a 36G. They were painful. From the surgery my milk ducts were a bit cramped which led to engorgement. Hot compress, massage the breast, nurse baby, frozen cabbage with the occasional grated ginger compress thrown in there was my life for two weeks. I was lucky my son nursed like a champ. He more than doubled his birth weight in less than 2 months. He was chunky and my amazing milk from my amazing breasts did that.
Within a few months of having my son I had to grieve, forgive and accept the choice that I made to alter one of the most amazing parts of my body. My son’s pediatrician told me at his two month check up, that I created nutritious bio-diesel milk. Then I heard the saying, “I make milk, what’s your super power?” I felt a sense of pride and joy that I had the most amazing gift of the universe. My breasts were nature’s gift to me as a woman to nourish my babe with a complete food that is made just for him.
My naked breasts have been displayed at malls, restaurants, parks, beaches, parking lots, and pretty much any where I’ve been. I am not ashamed to expose my breasts so that my babe can drink the sweet milk that he needs. Now the once perky breasts are sagging and worn but they’ve fed two boys for two years each. I am grateful. My breasts have taught me how to trust my body and appreciate my beauty.
Image Credit: Emma Whitney Photography